In my two decades of leadership experience, I’ve observed that one of the most challenging decisions we face isn’t about what to do—it’s about what to tolerate. The question of tolerance sits at the intersection of empathy and accountability, testing our judgment daily as we balance supporting our teams with maintaining high standards.
The Hidden Costs of Excessive Tolerance
Early in my career, I witnessed firsthand how unchecked tolerance can erode organizational health. My own supervisor’s passive acceptance of toxic behaviors—justified as “keeping the peace”—ultimately fractured team cohesion and diminished our collective performance. This experience taught me a crucial lesson: What we tolerate, We validate.
The progression is subtle but predictable:
- Minor infractions go unchallenged
- Boundaries become increasingly flexible
- Standards gradually erode
- Team morale and performance suffer
- Leadership credibility diminishes
Before long, what began as measured patience transforms into organizational permissiveness, creating a culture where mediocrity becomes the default standard.
Strategic Tolerance: Drawing Clear Lines
Through trial and error, I’ve developed a framework for determining when tolerance shifts from a virtue to a liability. Three critical indicators signal the need for immediate intervention:
1. Values Misalignment
When behaviors consistently contradict your organization’s core values, swift action becomes imperative. I’ve learned—sometimes painfully—that technical excellence never justifies ethical compromise. One high-performing team member who regularly undermines organizational values can damage culture more than their individual contributions can offset.
2. Contagious Negativity
Negative attitudes spread exponentially. In one instance, I delayed addressing a senior team member’s persistent pessimism, watching helplessly as their influence gradually suppressed innovation and collaboration across multiple departments. The lesson? Containing attitudinal contagion must take precedence over short-term disruption.
3. Persistent Underperformance
While growth requires patience, chronic underperformance demands resolution. I’ve found that extending tolerance beyond reasonable improvement windows rarely leads to turnarounds. Instead, it often breeds resentment among high performers who shoulder additional burden.
The Leadership Challenge
The most profound insight I’ve gained about tolerance is counterintuitive: excessive tolerance isn’t compassionate—it’s negligent. Every time we tolerate behavior that undermines our organization’s values, performance, or culture, we tacitly endorse it.
True leadership courage often manifests not in what we do, but in what we refuse to tolerate. This means:
- Setting clear, non-negotiable standards
- Addressing issues promptly when those standards are breached
- Making difficult decisions that protect organizational health
- Maintaining consistency in enforcement
Looking Forward: Strategic Tolerance Implementation
For leaders seeking to recalibrate their tolerance thresholds, I recommend starting with three questions:
- What behaviors am I currently tolerating that contradict our stated values?
- Where has my tolerance for underperformance created unintended consequences?
- How quickly do I typically address issues once they’re identified?
The answers often reveal opportunities for immediate action and long-term strategic adjustment.
Summary
Strategic tolerance—knowing precisely what to accept and what to address—distinguishes exceptional leaders from merely competent ones. While universal tolerance might seem enlightened, it often masks a deeper reluctance to engage in necessary conflict.
The most impactful leaders I’ve encountered share one common trait: they understand that their tolerance threshold directly shapes organizational culture. They recognize that every act of tolerance or intolerance sends a message about what the organization truly values—not just what it claims to value.
As you reflect on your own leadership approach, consider this: Are you tolerating behaviors because they truly align with your (your organization’s) best interests, or because addressing them feels uncomfortable? Your answer might reveal the next critical step in your leadership journey.
Sam Palazzolo, Principal Officer @ The Javelin Institute
